I started living away from home when I was 16. Freshly out of highschool and just starting college. Well, my sister did look out after me - we were together for two years, because my parents wanted her to look after me. Aside from that, and having my allowances given to me by my parents, I was pretty independent.
They finally let me live alone when I was 19. My sister then commutes everyday from Bulacan to Manila, but I stayed at a dormitory near UST. My biggest concern then was budgeting my allowance - meals, projects, photocopies, contributions, and other extra payments. I could always ask my parents for more money, but asking too much was out of the equation.
As for decisions, my parents let me decide on my own. If I make mistakes, they talk to me, put some sense in my head. The thing is, they let me live on my own. They didn't stop me from studying in the city when I can clearly choose among a selection of good schools in our province. They let me date. They let me go whenever I please - just as long as I know my limitations, let them know I'm safe, and let them know about the "big" decisions. I could rule all of that out, but they respect me, so in turn, I respect them as parents - they should be consulted, and filled up with what's happening in my life.
So four years in college in Manila. It taught me a lot of things, and I am truly grateful to my parents for letting me explore the world on my own. They were teaching me to be independent, to live alone, to learn without them constricting me. Be free, my Dad said, but never forget your responsibilities.
And now, I am working in Manila. I pay my rent, pay my credit card bills, budget my own money, cook my own food, do my laundry, iron my clothes, buy my younger sisters' things they need in school and when I have extra money, give back a little to my parents. I use my own money, have a place I couldn't call my own but I can live away from home if I want to. And my parents let me. I am now a grown woman, a strong, independent, sensible woman. And I am proud of me. That I could live on my own now, without having to ask my parents for money. (God that would be AWFUL!) What I ask of them now has nothing to do with material things - just their old world wisdom, guidance, and love. They treat me as an equal, they respect my opinions and let me grow on my own. They listen to me, and I listen to them. Thankful, yes I am. Forever.
My adventure is just starting. Right now, I am tight on cash, thinking about my meal plan for the week, my planned vacation and trying to save little by little. Boy, if you have a little amount of cash, you'd have to think of ways to make it last on the next payday, and always keep in mind: BILLS to pay.
The world is a cruel place to live alone. But surviving, that's the real challenge. You don't have to be alone, sure, but depend on yourself, love and help others, but never ever be a burden.
Responsibilities. Work and play. It's all about balancing.
You are damn right I am one amazing woman.
I will conquer worlds.
No comments:
Post a Comment